Wednesday, April 05, 2017

Sad Songs Aren't Sad Anymore

"Well, I guess I'm doing this again," I said to myself as I plugged my phone into the aux cable and started my Hyundai. My commute is about 30 minutes long, and I knew from Monday's experience that I would be able to hear nine of the album's eleven songs. I also knew from Monday's experience that the drive would be somber, and my attitude for the day would be extremely contemplative and somewhat grateful.

This began on March 21, when I noticed a tweet from a musician I really like:


Several days later, Twitter informed me that he liked the following tweet:


That was enough to push me to look up this song, and I listened to it alone, in my basement, before heading to bed. And I read a small amount about the album, and I realized that Mount Eerie is the man who formerly performed as The Microphones, who I had a vague knowledge of thanks to the only mix CD Adrienne ever gave me.

For the next few days, I asked people and the internet for the saddest song ever. Kim guessed the popular answer was Eric Clapton's "Tears in Heaven". The internet had some lists, like Hank Williams' "I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry" or George Jones' "He Stopped Loving Her Today". Shawn thought of musical numbers like "I Dreamed a Dream" from Les Miserables and "It's Quiet Uptown" from Hamilton. I thought about all of the sad Elliott Smith songs I love, like "I Didn't Understand" and "Everything Means Nothing to Me".

And I realized that all of those songs sound like Beck's "Sexx Laws" now, because I have heard "Real Death" by Mount Eerie.

I couldn't stop thinking about "Real Death", so I bought the album.

I listened to it for the first time on Monday, and sat in my parking space as the final two songs played. I went about my work day, and that night I felt so grateful to be with my family, on the couch with my children. I sat with my daughter on my lap, playing with the hair on the back of her head and touching the little divot on the back of her neck while she watched cartoons.

So, here is what I suggest:

First, acknowledge that you want to hear "Real Death". Partially out of curiosity, but mostly because you want to be in awe of the power of this song, even though there is a very good chance it will make you cry. You've cried at art before. It's fine.

Are you ready? Can you carve out two and a half minutes to play this song, and maybe another five minutes to process what you've heard? Good. Listen, and when you're done keep reading below:





Now, you're ready to read a little bit about the song and the album. You can let the Bandcamp player continue to stream the other available songs, "Raven" and "Crow" while you read the author's description of the album:

WRITTEN AND RECORDED
August 31st to Dec. 6th, 2016 in the same room where Geneviève died, using mostly her instruments, her guitar, her bass, her pick, her amp, her old family accordion, writing the words on her paper, looking out the same window.  
Why share this much? Why open up like this? Why tell you, stranger, about these personal moments, the devastation and the hanging love? Our little family bubble was so sacred for so long. We carefully held it behind a curtain of privacy when we’d go out and do our art and music selves, too special to share, especially in our hyper-shared imbalanced times. Then we had a baby and this barrier felt even more important. (I still don’t want to tell you our daughter’s name.) Then in May 2015 they told us Geneviève had a surprise bad cancer, advanced pancreatic, and the ground opened up. What matters now? we thought. Then on July 9th 2016 she died at home and I belonged to nobody anymore. My internal moments felt like public property. The idea that I could have a self or personal preferences or songs eroded down into an absurd old idea leftover from a more self-indulgent time before I was a hospital-driver, a caregiver, a child-raiser, a griever. I am open now, and these songs poured out quickly in the fall, watching the days grey over and watching the neighbors across the alley tear down and rebuild their house. I make these songs and put them out into the world just to multiply my voice saying that I love her. I want it known.  
"Death Is Real" could be the name of this album. These cold mechanics of sickness and loss are real and inescapable, and can bring an alienating, detached sharpness. But it is not the thing I want to remember. A crow did look at me. There is an echo of Geneviève that still rings, a reminder of the love and infinity beneath all of this obliteration. That’s why.

- Phil Elverum
Dec. 11th, 2016

You can read album reviews, where people like you and I try to process what they're hearing:



and




You can read a profile of the artist, and that can lead you to the profiler's piece in the New York Times describing what it was like for him to lose his daughter to an impossibly rare accident.

Perhaps now you are thinking, "Why the hell did I do this to myself? Why would I buy this and subject myself to more of this music?" I don't know. Speaking for myself, it has a hold on me. It's remarkably sad, but it's still remarkable.

Tuesday, April 04, 2017

March Madness Fantasy 2017 - Final Four and Championship

Boy, the Final Four and Championship games sure sucked hard. Ugly stuff.

How did your players do? Well, in the Final Four they did this well. The STUDS:

OWNER ROUND SELECTION PLAYER TEAM SEED GAME5_SCORE
1 Gav 1 9 Kennedy Meeks North Carolina 1 44
2 Chris 1 5 Nigel Williams-Goss Gonzaga 1 31
3 Chris 5 45 Jordan Bell Oregon 3 31
4 Stu 1 6 Justin Jackson North Carolina 1 25
5 Chris 6 56 Sindarius Thornwell South Carolina 7 23
6 Gav 4 32 Przemek Karnowski Gonzaga 1 19
7 Brian 8 80 Jordan Mathews Gonzaga 1 17

and them DUDS:

OWNER ROUND SELECTION PLAYER TEAM SEED GAME5_SCORE
1 Dan 3 30 Isaiah Hicks North Carolina 1 5
2 James 7 67 Johnathan Williams Gonzaga 1 9
3 Chris 2 16 Joel Berry II North Carolina 1 15
4 Dan 5 50 Dillon Brooks Oregon 3 15


In the 'ship, Joel Berry II had the best game, with 33 points, followed by Williams-Goss with 28. Weird, both of those guys are Chris' players.



Chris did it, everybody! He bested the previous best, totaling 866 points, about one player's good game more than Bob's 831 from last year. I would wager that this was also the largest margin of victory we've ever seen, but I am not going to bother researching that fact.


Chris' worst player's total was 115th out of the 179 players I tracked. Not too shabby. The highest total was Justin Jackson, followed closely by Williams-Goss, Thornwell, Meeks and Bluiett.



Here's a similar scatterplot, but this one shows every player I tracked instead of only owned players.




Here's even more stats. Stats are life. This is a boxplot that shows the median, quartiles, and outliers for two groups: seeds 1 through 7 and seeds 8 through 13. (I excluded seeds 14-16 because we avoid drafting most all of them.)




Here's some more stats, again showing all players I tracked from seeds 1 through 13.


No one player set any scoring records this year. Here's the record book:

239.5  Julius Randle Kentucky 2014 (1.5x bonus)
193.5  Jarnell Stokes Tennessee 2014 (1.5x bonus)
196     Frank Kaminsky Wisconsin 2015
196     Kemba Walker, Connecticut 2011
194     Anthony Davis, Kentucky 2012
190     Cleanthony Early, Wichita St 2013 (1.5x bonus)

Here's the table of all this year's players.

OWNER ROUND SELECTION PLAYER TEAM SEED TOTAL_GAMES TOTAL_SCORE
1 Stu 1 6 Justin Jackson North Carolina 1 6 170.0
2 Chris 1 5 Nigel Williams-Goss Gonzaga 1 6 166.0
3 Chris 6 56 Sindarius Thornwell South Carolina 7 5 166.0
4 Gav 1 9 Kennedy Meeks North Carolina 1 6 163.0
5 James 6 54 Trevon Bluiett Xavier 11 4 161.0
6 Chris 5 45 Jordan Bell Oregon 3 5 145.0
7 0 0 Tyler Dorsey Oregon 3 5 141.0
8 0 0 Chimezie Metu USC 11 3 130.5
9 0 0 J.P. Macura Xavier 11 4 130.0
10 Brian 1 1 Frank Mason III Kansas 1 4 129.0
11 0 0 Nigel Hayes Wisconsin 8 3 127.5
12 Gav 5 49 Ethan Happ Wisconsin 8 3 121.0
13 Chris 2 16 Joel Berry II North Carolina 1 6 115.0
14 0 0 PJ Dozier South Carolina 7 5 112.0
15 Dan 5 50 Dillon Brooks Oregon 3 5 111.0
16 Shawn 1 3 Josh Jackson Kansas 1 4 109.0
17 Jake 1 8 De'Aaron Fox Kentucky 2 4 106.0
18 James 7 67 Johnathan Williams Gonzaga 1 6 105.0
19 0 0 Zach Collins Gonzaga 1 6 103.0
20 Brian 8 80 Jordan Mathews Gonzaga 1 6 103.0
21 0 0 Bronson Koenig Wisconsin 8 3 102.5
22 Chris 8 76 Derrick Walton Jr. Michigan 7 3 97.0
23 0 0 Jordan McLaughlin USC 11 3 96.5
24 Brian 3 21 Caleb Swanigan Purdue 4 3 96.0
25 Gav 8 72 Miles Bridges Michigan St 9 2 94.0
26 Jake 7 68 Wesley Iwundu Kansas St 11 2 93.0
27 Dan 3 30 Isaiah Hicks North Carolina 1 6 91.0
28 Stu 5 46 Bryant McIntosh Northwestern 8 2 91.0
29 0 0 Chima Moneke UC Davis 16 2 90.5
30 Bob 2 19 Edrice Adebayo Kentucky 2 4 90.0
31 Gav 4 32 Przemek Karnowski Gonzaga 1 6 89.0
32 0 0 Dylan Ennis Oregon 3 5 89.0
33 Jake 2 13 Devonte' Graham Kansas 1 4 85.0
34 Luke 2 17 Johnathan Motley Baylor 3 3 83.0
35 Shawn 5 43 Jacorey Williams Middle Tenn 12 2 80.5
36 James 1 7 Malik Monk Kentucky 2 4 79.0
37 Luke 4 37 Jevon Carter West Virginia 4 3 78.0
38 0 0 Moses Kingsley Arkansas 8 2 78.0
39 Shawn 3 23 Allonzo Trier Arizona 2 3 77.0
40 Chris 7 65 Devin Robinson Florida 4 4 76.0
41 Stu 7 66 Vincent Edwards Purdue 4 3 76.0
42 Dan 2 11 Lonzo Ball UCLA 3 3 75.0
43 Shawn 4 38 Isaiah Briscoe Kentucky 2 4 73.0
44 Dan 1 10 Lauri Markkanen Arizona 2 3 71.0
45 Luke 3 24 TJ Leaf UCLA 3 3 71.0
46 0 0 KeVaughn Allen Florida 4 4 70.0
47 Bob 6 59 Kelan Martin Butler 4 3 68.0
48 0 0 Brynton Lemar UC Davis 16 2 67.0
49 Bob 5 42 Thomas Welsh UCLA 3 3 66.0
50 Jake 3 28 Bonzie Colson Notre Dame 5 2 66.0
51 0 0 Jock Landale St Mary's 7 2 66.0
52 0 0 Nick Ward Michigan St 9 2 65.5
53 0 0 Reggie Upshaw Middle Tenn 12 2 65.5
54 Luke 6 57 Sviatoslav Mykhailiuk Kansas 1 4 65.0
55 0 0 Zak Irvin Michigan 7 3 65.0
56 0 0 Josh Perkins Gonzaga 1 6 64.0
57 0 0 Landry Shamet Wichita St 10 2 63.5
58 0 0 E.C. Matthews Rhode Island 11 2 63.5
59 Chris 3 25 Landen Lucas Kansas 1 4 63.0
60 Bob 7 62 Dwayne Bacon Florida St 3 2 62.0
61 0 0 Isaac Hamilton UCLA 3 3 62.0
62 Stu 2 15 Monte Morris Iowa St 5 2 62.0
63 0 0 Shaquille Morris Wichita St 10 2 61.5
64 0 0 Andrew Chrabascz Butler 4 3 61.0
65 James 2 14 Donovan Mitchell Louisville 2 2 60.0
66 0 0 Scottie Lindsey Northwestern 8 2 59.5
67 Jake 4 33 Jawun Evans Oklahoma St 10 1 59.0
68 Brian 2 20 Jonathan Isaac Florida St 3 2 58.0
69 0 0 Daryl Macon Arkansas 8 2 55.5
70 0 0 D.J. Johnson Kansas St 11 2 55.5
71 Luke 7 64 Dusan Ristic Arizona 2 3 55.0
72 0 0 Norbertas Giga Jacksonville St 15 1 55.0
73 0 0 Barry Brown Kansas St 11 2 54.5
74 0 0 Junior Robinson Mount St Marys 16 2 54.5
75 0 0 Anthony Lamb Vermont 13 1 54.0
76 Stu 3 26 Grayson Allen Duke 2 2 53.0
77 James 5 47 Deonte Burton Iowa St 5 2 53.0
78 0 0 Bryant Crawford Wake Forest 11 1 53.0
79 Bob 3 22 Jayson Tatum Duke 2 2 52.0
80 Gav 3 29 John Collins Wake Forest 11 1 52.0
81 0 0 Jimmy Hall Kent State 14 1 51.5
82 0 0 JeQuan Lewis VCU 10 1 50.5
83 0 0 Brandon Goodwin Florida Gulf Coast 14 1 50.5
84 Brian 4 40 Amile Jefferson Duke 2 2 50.0
85 0 0 Cameron Oliver Nevada 12 1 50.0
86 0 0 Jordan Caroline Nevada 12 1 49.5
87 Shawn 8 78 Jordan Washington Iona 14 1 49.5
88 Jake 6 53 Rawle Alkins Arizona 2 3 49.0
89 0 0 Gary Clark Cincinnati 6 2 49.0
90 0 0 Aaron Holiday UCLA 3 3 48.0
91 Shawn 6 58 Nathan Adrian West Virginia 4 3 48.0
92 Stu 4 35 Bryce Alford UCLA 3 3 47.0
93 0 0 Xavier Cooks Winthrop 13 1 47.0
94 0 0 Quinton Hooker North Dakota 15 1 47.0
95 0 0 Chris Flemmings UNCW 12 1 46.5
96 Dan 7 70 Kadeem Allen Arizona 2 3 45.0
97 0 0 Manu Lecomte Baylor 3 3 44.0
98 Luke 5 44 Markis McDuffie Wichita St 10 2 42.5
99 0 0 Jordon Varnado Troy 15 1 42.5
100 0 0 Mangok Mathiang Louisville 2 2 42.0
101 Gav 7 69 Jo Lual-Acuil Jr. Baylor 3 3 42.0
102 0 0 Zach LeDay Virginia Tech 9 1 41.5
103 0 0 Nana Foulland Bucknell 13 1 41.5
104 0 0 Xavier Rathan-Mayes Florida St 3 2 41.0
105 0 0 Spencer Weisz Princeton 12 1 40.5
106 0 0 Ian Baker New Mex St 14 1 40.5
107 Bob 4 39 Deng Adel Louisville 2 2 40.0
108 0 0 Khadeen Carrington Seton Hall 9 1 39.5
109 0 0 Rodney Bullock Providence 11 1 39.5
110 0 0 Elijah Long Mount St Marys 16 2 39.5
111 James 8 74 Giddy Potts Middle Tenn 12 2 39.0
112 Brian 5 41 Angel Delgado Seton Hall 9 1 38.5
113 0 0 JaJuan Johnson Marquette 10 1 38.5
114 0 0 Calvin Hermanson St Mary's 7 2 38.0
115 Chris 4 36 Hassan Martin Rhode Island 11 2 38.0
116 0 0 Lavone Holland II N Kentucky 15 1 37.5
117 0 0 Keon Johnson Winthrop 13 1 37.0
118 0 0 Jeffrey Carroll Oklahoma St 10 1 36.5
119 0 0 Mike Daum South Dakota St 16 1 36.5
120 Gav 2 12 Jalen Brunson Villanova 1 2 36.0
121 0 0 Deon Edwin Kent State 14 1 35.5
122 Bob 1 2 Josh Hart Villanova 1 2 35.0
123 0 0 London Perrantes Virginia 5 2 35.0
124 0 0 Drew McDonald N Kentucky 15 1 35.0
125 0 0 Luke Kornet Vanderbilt 9 1 34.5
126 0 0 Al Freeman Baylor 3 3 34.0
127 0 0 Dajuan Graf NC Central 16 1 34.0
128 Brian 7 61 T.J. Cromer E Tenn St 13 1 33.5
129 0 0 Frank Jackson Duke 2 2 33.0
130 Luke 8 77 Canyon Barry Florida 4 4 33.0
131 Dan 6 51 Matt Farrell Notre Dame 5 2 33.0
132 James 4 34 Semi Ojeleye SMU 6 1 33.0
133 0 0 Malcolm Drumwright Jacksonville St 15 1 31.0
134 0 0 Erik Thomas New Orleans 16 1 30.5
135 0 0 Seth Allen Virginia Tech 9 1 30.0
136 Dan 8 71 Patrick Cole NC Central 16 1 30.0
137 Brian 6 60 Kyle Washington Cincinnati 6 2 29.0
138 0 0 Bruce Brown Miami 8 1 29.0
139 0 0 Zach Thomas Bucknell 13 1 29.0
140 0 0 Geno Crandall North Dakota 15 1 28.5
141 0 0 Sam Cassell Jr. Iona 14 1 27.5
142 James 3 27 Mikal Bridges Villanova 1 2 27.0
143 Luke 1 4 Luke Kennard Duke 2 2 27.0
144 Dan 4 31 Quentin Snider Louisville 2 2 27.0
145 0 0 Jordan Murphy Minnesota 5 1 27.0
146 0 0 Luke Fischer Marquette 10 1 26.0
147 0 0 Payton Henson Vermont 13 1 26.0
148 0 0 Steven Cook Princeton 12 1 25.5
149 0 0 Eli Chuha New Mex St 14 1 25.5
150 Stu 6 55 V.J. Beachem Notre Dame 5 2 25.0
151 Shawn 7 63 Sterling Brown SMU 6 1 25.0
152 0 0 Davon Reed Miami 8 1 24.5
153 0 0 Phil Forte, III Oklahoma St 10 1 24.0
154 Shawn 2 18 Kris Jenkins Villanova 1 2 23.0
155 0 0 Zach Lofton Texas Southern 16 1 23.0
156 0 0 Wesley Person Troy 15 1 22.5
157 0 0 Kyron Cartwright Providence 11 1 21.5
158 0 0 Jaylen Johnson Louisville 2 2 21.0
159 0 0 Justin Tillman VCU 10 1 20.5
160 0 0 Demontrae Jefferson Texas Southern 16 1 20.0
161 0 0 Christavious Gill New Orleans 16 1 19.5
162 Stu 8 75 Carlton Bragg Kansas 1 4 19.0
163 0 0 Justin Jackson Maryland 6 1 18.0
164 0 0 C.J. Bryce UNCW 12 1 18.0
165 0 0 Darral Willis Jr. Wichita St 10 2 17.5
166 Jake 8 73 Conner Frankamp Wichita St 10 2 17.5
167 0 0 Marcus Foster Creighton 6 1 17.0
168 Jake 5 48 Melo Trimble Maryland 6 1 17.0
169 0 0 Kendall Pollard Dayton 7 1 17.0
170 0 0 Justin Patton Creighton 6 1 16.0
171 0 0 Reed Tellinghuisen South Dakota St 16 1 15.5
172 0 0 Devon Hall Virginia 5 2 15.0
173 0 0 Demetris Morant Florida Gulf Coast 14 1 15.0
174 0 0 Jeff Roberson Vanderbilt 9 1 14.0
175 0 0 Charles Cooke Dayton 7 1 12.0
176 Bob 8 79 Ben Moore SMU 6 1 10.0
177 0 0 Desonta Bradford E Tenn St 13 1 10.0
178 Gav 6 52 Nate Mason Minnesota 5 1 9.0
179 0 0 Rickey McGill Iona 14 1 3.0