What to say on this momentous occasion? Uh...
Today, after 28 years, I finally made the connection between the name "Stephen" and the name "Stephanie".
It wasn't nearly as bad an episode from my sophomore year of high school. I was listening to the geometry teacher discuss triangles. I'd always been good at the subject, so I nodded in agreement when Teach told the class that a triangle has three sides and three angles. I was thinking about how those three angles always add up to 180 degrees when he said, "That's why they call it a triangle. Tri-angle. Three angles."
It had never occurred to me.
(It's also never occurred to me that my first day of high school geometry sounds like a class for the learning-disabled. We weren't, you know. I mean, I'm not. I rocked proofs like a champ. QED.)