Monday, March 21, 2016

March Madness Fantasy 2016 - Round of 32 Results

Before I show you the scores, ladies and gentlemen, let's remember that this whole thing is a dumb crapshoot and you can't blame yourself much for drafting a bad team, especially if you are the guy writing this. Hey, guy - you're a smart person and not a piece of shit who choked despite having the 2nd pick in the draft. Like, none of us drafted a single Wisconsin player. Do we feel dumb for that? No! That team is garbage that stinks like garbage, even if they did make it to the Sweet Sixteen.

So, what happened on Saturday and Sunday?


1Chuck436Kris DunnProvidence951.5
2Chris321Domantas SabonisGonzaga1149.5
3Bob655Michael GbinijeSyracuse1046.0
4Brian13Buddy HieldOklahoma243.0
5Bob766Roosevelt JonesButler940.5
6Chris220Ben BentilProvidence939.5
7Gavin544Daniel HamiltonConnecticut938.0

Some great performances were put together in losing efforts. The highly coveted Providence duo proved their worth in a loss to UNC, and Roosevelt Jones finished out his ninth year at Butler with style. Hield and Sabonis continued to excel.


1Stu874Sviatoslav MykhailiukKansas10
2Dan879Jordan LoveridgeUtah31
3James432Kennedy MeeksN. Carolina14
4James769James FarrXavier25
5Shawn651Myles DavisXavier25
6Bob326Chris BoucherOregon17
7Luke18Jakob PoeltlUtah310

Mr Irrelevant, a Utah forward who I still am not certain why I drafted, put up 1 lonely point in a crushing defeat to Gonzaga. He was better than Stu's Svi, who got 6 minutes of playing time, scoring one point and having that point subtracted by a turnover. Also in the bad group: two Xavier guys, a UNC backup, Oregon's shot blocker, and Luke's genetically superior Austrian NBA prospect.

So, Gavin has surpassed Luke for the lead, and is in the catbird seat with 4 players remaining. Or is he? Catbird seat? What is that? We'll breakdown the leaderboard and sort the contenders from the pretenders below. Not literally.

I am still proud of this stacked bar chart, even though that Cal guy and the Green Bay guy are on top of each other.

Players with the bonus multiplier are still the highest scoring, but Buddy Hield and other top-seeded players are creeping upward in value.


1Jeremy MorganNorthern Iowa1179.5
2Brandon SherrodYale1251.5
3JeQuan LewisVCU1050.5
4Thomas WalkupS.F. Austin1448.0
5DeAndre' BembrySt. Joseph's847.5
6Eric McClellanGonzaga1146.0
7Roger WoodsAR Little Rock1246.0

I mean, like I said above - am I supposed to feel dumb because I didn't pick some VCU guy? I do not. Kinda.

Looking ahead, let's see who's catbirding who's seats.

1 Gavin 481.0 4
2 Luke 423.0 2
3 Bob 411.5 6
4 Shawn 396.5 5
5 Chris 382.0 3
6 James 378.0 7
7 Brian 376.0 5
8 Stu 340.5 5
9 Dan 312.5 3
10 Chuck 267.5 2

1. Gav. He's still got 4 guys thanks to Texas A&M literally breaking Bill James' formula for when a lead is safe. A&M, Iowa State, KU, and Notre Dame could all potentially meet in the Final Four, but they won't. But if they do, congrats to Gav, the best of the best.

2. Luke. He's only got two guys left, and you guessed it, they're White. Duke's center and a Nova guard aren't gonna take him to the championship. 

3. Bob. This Kenpom stathead is rough and ready for more. His Syracuse guy should be bounced soon, but he's got a Virginia forward, an Oklahoma guard, two Oregon Ducks, and oh yeah, UNC's main man. If KU or Nova goes down soon, Bob might be catting birdseats very soon.

4. Shawn. He'll lose a player when Maryland and KU face off, and then lose another if OU and Oregon meet. Shawn's destined for the middle unless he can ride the Zag wave with Kyle Wiltjer to championshiptown.

5. Chris. Landon Lucas is averaging better numbers than expected, but who gives a shit, Chris is currently nothing but a Gonzaga jersey waving in the wind above the corpse of Denzel Valentine. Maybe they put up the jersey to help shield the corpse from the sun? It's a mystery. (He also has an A&M guy.)

6. James. He's got two Dukies, and two Tar Heels. If those two teams square off for the Division I Men's Championship, that would really work out nice for him. He's got a player each from Nova, Iowa State, and Virginia's finest Malcom Brogdon. If the Big 12 and Pac 12 fall, James could get up again, and you're never gonna keep him down.

7. Brian. Buddy Hield and Miami's McClellan are leading the way for him, and those two teams need to meet in the Final Four to give him the best chance to make up ground. The only man he has on the other side of the bracket is Virginia's point guard.

8. Stu. Five guys left, but really four since Svi barely plays. He really could have used Northern Iowa not suffering the worst loss of all time, but here we are. He'll lose Paige or Yogi Farrell when UNC meets Indiana, leaving him with Miami's Angel Rodriguez and a Nova guy. So it would have to be a Miami/Indiana final for him to have a prayer, and even then it's probably a really impossible prayer to a really insignificant god with very little power.

9. Dan. #1 pick Perry Ellis and also-rans from OU and Oregon. All on the left side of the bracket. Lame.

10. Chuck. Ouch, man. KU's lowest-scoring guard and an OU guard not named Hield.


smmcclure said...

This is the time of year when my team starts to cannibalize itself because I didn't pay attention to what region my players are in. Happens every time.

smmcclure said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Gav said...

This is where my over-exuberance for choosing the best value 8+ seeded players starts to bite me in the ass.