"If you find an old sun-bleached tree limb, you can put it up to your face and act like a walrus."
* * *
Today was the library book sale fundraiser. I bought a few classic pieces of literature, which means I am officially abandoning "The Brothers Karamozov". Eat it, Mother Russia!
I saw a stack of "The Value of Believing in Yourself" books. I have to think if Louis Pasteur were alive to see his caricature on the cover, he'd object.
Scientists -- what nerds! And sure, his nose wasn't small, but it wasn't a gigantic red clown nose!
I check in with the optometrist once a year. At every previous visit, he's marveled at my optic nerves, calling them "two standard deviations" larger than average. We casually rap about statistics all the time.
I splurged on photos of these optic nerves last week. Sure, it cost an extra $22, but I deserve it -- a man of my status enjoys the finer things in life, like fluoride treatments that aren't covered by Delta Dental, or fancy eyeball pictures.
They emailed the jpegs, but didn't label which eye is which, so I had to guess which way to arrange the two files. I chose the way that made them look less like boobs, but still kinda like boobs.
Given a lack of other thrilling material to work with (Want to hear about driving through Missouri with my lady? In the Chillicothe McDonalds, there was a kid with a deer hunting hat that said "Buck Star" and a shirt with "Lil Bro" printed above the number 10. The end.), I'm posting an email conversation with Alipete regarding the Nick Hornby novel / John Cusack film "High Fidelity".
(The title of the book/film, by the way, comes from an Elvis Costello song. At least, there is an Elvis Costello song called "High Fidelity", and I'd be really surprised if the title does not originate from that great song. You can listen to it:
End parentheses.)
I just read "The Corrections," and I will NOT recommend that. Now I am reading "High Fidelity," which is ruined because I've seen the movie a BILLION times. I also just read "What Is the What." Have you read that? I thought it was phenomenal, and now I am sponsoring a Sudanese student. That is not an exaggeration.
Well, lookie lookie. Somebody’s been reading books from dn’s collection. What is the What and High Fidelity. I have a lot to say about High Fidelity, if you want (but not much to add to What is the What. That book doesn’t really provoke much discussion except for “Yikes” and “Whoa”). I’d also seen the movie several times first, but cherished the book nonetheless. I read it in the midst of my blue period, which followed my worst breakup, and coincided with a lonely trip to Ann Arbor. Good stuff. Anyway, let’s book club it up when you’re done.
I guess I’ll go elsewhere for a book recommendation. Great, now Floyd is just going to tell me to read something about Russia.
50 pages left. I look forward to this discussion.
Also, I'm not really a "Men Are From Mars"-type person, but how unfortunate is it that guys get cool break-up, what-does-it-all-mean stories like "High Fidelity," and girls have rubbish like "Eat, Pray, Love"? The quality gap there is as big as the difference between, well, fiction and non-fiction, you could say.
Good point. Maybe it’s the pursuer vs. the pursued? They’re bound to reflect on things differently? What about Stella getting her groove back? Was that different than “Eat, Pray, Love”?
I don't know anything about Stella or her groove. And I don't know too much yet about "Eat, Pray, Love." I'm embarrassed to say I know anything about it all. It was purchased in a moment of weakness, OK? Anyhow, it is fundamentally very different from "High Fidelity," and I appreciate Rob Fleming's musings much more than Elizabeth Gilbert's.
Can you remind me if there is much in High Fidelity that is not in the film? I thought there was, but now I worry I’m confusing it with About a Boy, which was super different than the movie.
There's not a ton different in "High Fidelity." In the book, his relationship with Marie LaSalle is a little more involved, and his parents are bigger characters. He celebrates a birthday. There are actually five girls on his Top 5 Break-Up list, whereas in the movie, he kicks off the last one for Laura. And he doesn't start a record label; he goes back to DJing in the end... unless there's more to come in the last 10 pages.
For starters, I allege that it is a male-oriented fairy tale of a perfect breakup. Rob:
Gets to wallow in pity and surround himself with music
Gets proof that his exes are not that great, and he’s not missing out on them
Gets to bed a musician
Does not have to feel guilty about bedding the musician, because Laura is also with someone
Gets Laura back
Becomes a somewhat well-adjusted, comfortable adult
I'll agree. He doesn't have to feel guilty about anything: the post-breakup musician, the affair, the abortion, the debt. It's all forgotten, and he doesn't have to account for any of it.
And maybe you read it differently than I did, but it seems to be a pretty bleak picture of love. I feel like Rob thinks "Well, this relationship will never be new or even exciting again, but it's something. I'm too lazy/unlikely to find anything better, so this'll do." And Laura is the same. She knows the relationship is no good, but she doesn't want to look for someone who'd be a better match. Everyone is settling. Am I wrong?
I don’t think it’s bleak. I can only go on the film version, since I only read the book once, but I didn’t see it as settling. Yes, they are tired of looking for other, “better” people, but they’ve also realized that a more suitable match probably does not exist.
I don’t know the female perspective on this, but as a male, I can say without hesitation that the looking is exhausting. And I don’t mean dating – I mean looking. Looking to see how attractive (or not) a jogger on the sidewalk is as you drive by, looking at the receptionists in the ophthalmologist’s office, looking around on the bus or in the airport terminal. (It was only in the past few years when I trained myself to stop looking in some of those situations - really, what would you do if the jogger was attractive? Stop the car?) Rob is tired of looking. Yes, Laura isn’t new or exciting anymore, but every relationship loses that initial thrill. He’s realized that a Manic Pixie Dream Girl is a myth, and he knows if he just focuses on Laura they will be happy.
Yeah, I suppose. Something about it still strikes me as sad, though.
I agree that the looking can be exhausting. And I understand that the thrill of a new person can fade and that it's sad to run out of "firsts." I appreciate those sentiments. But I guess, in a perfect world, Rob -- being with Laura -- shouldn't be tired of looking; he shouldn't want to look anymore.
Maybe that's too idealistic. I mean, this is obviously more a story about maturing and realizing what "real-life" love/commitment is than it is a story about love. And the fact that I think it's kind of bleak probably points to some disappointments in my future. But, I get it. I do. The more I write and think about this, the more I get it. It's just a bummer.
I always liked the "Do I listen to pop music because I'm miserable, or am I miserable because I listen to pop music?" [See the 0:44 mark in the clip below.] debate. What a masochistic thing to do to yourself. Post-breakup, I much prefer episodes of "30 Rock" to sentimental pop records. But I guess Rob is a much cooler person than I.
Take it from someone who has made CD mixes titled “Breakup: Pessimistic” and “Breakup: Optimistic” – you do NOT want to indulge more than one or two listens to the pessimistic playlist. I’m convinced that error extended my blue period for several months.
Obviously he shouldn’t WANT to look anymore, but he’s a man, man! It’s in his biology; or, if you want to argue the sow-your-oats urges, you have to concede that he’s conditioned himself to seek and impress and conquer women for the last 10 or 15 years (I don’t remember Rob’s age). The revelation is that the cute tattooed girls that wander into his record shoppe aren’t better options, they’re just other options.
This book/story speaks to you more than it does to me. That's what I've learned here. Which is not to say that I didn't enjoy it. It's one of my favorite movies of all time. (Maybe I just enjoy this existential crisis more when I'm watching John Cusack endure it.)
And though I question Rob's methods, it's still a better way to deal with a breakup than eating Ben & Jerry's and watching "Love, Actually."
The 1972 America hit "A Horse with No Name" was featured in the beginning and the end of this week's episode of "Breaking Bad". Consequently, it's been in my head for the past four days.
It's a sweet tune to hum for the first day or so -- then it rapidly sours. When the "la laaaaa laaa la la la la la la laaa laaaaa la" chorus rolls around, I think about a college roommate shout-singing it. He liked to wear an Allmann Brothers "Eat a Peach" T-shirt.
"Breaking Bad" is terribly good. They break so bad on that show. During this week's discomforting scenes, I found myself looking away from the TV as family members argued with each other. I exhibited the same behavior when watching "A Serious Man" on DVD Monday night.
Why would I do that? I've been watching and enjoying gritty, realistic drama for many years, and I haven't turned away in the past. I hypothesize that reality television is to blame. When some reality star coot crosses the line from "entertainingly dumb" to "embarrassing example of the humanity's worst", I wonder why I turned it to "16 and Pregnant" in the first place and refocus down at my laptop. My brain has lost the ability to distinguish excellent dramatic acting from horrific real-life behavior.
Hola amigos. I know it's been a while since I rapped at ya, but things have been crazy. I needed a vacation just to get over my vacation! Right? You guys get it.
When I wrote the 2009 Netflix recap, I realized it was too long for anyone to pay much attention to, and too full of great information for anyone to fully absorb. This year, I plan to review DVDs more frequently, to keep you in the loop (foreshadowing).
Here's what I've seen so far this year, in chronological order:
It Might Get Loud
I like Jack White, The Edge, and Jimmy Page, but I did not like this documentary. It skimmed the surface of each of their lives and approaches to music, but didn't delve very deep, that is what she said. It might be a movie that only guitar players like.
Moon
Moon is an excellent hard sci-fi film. If you like sci-fi films, you should watch it without researching the matter. Don't even read the synopsis on the Netflix sleeve -- go in cold and you'll really enjoy yourself. That is not what she said. Also, Sam Rockwell is so good at everything -- why isn't he in more cool movies? He's in stupid "Everybody's Fine" Robert DeNiro bullshit when he should be owning Hollywood. If you doubt his greatness, and you don't mind very obscene language, watch from 1:52 to 2:25 at this video, and behold the glory:
Croupier
This titular croupier person is a young Clive Owen. He lays some broads and finds some intra-casino intrigue, but it's one of those movies where the lead character is a struggling writer. Can we be done with those movies, please? This particular movie is okay -- it will hold your interest, but won't wow you. That is what she said?
Munich
Yeah, I'd never seen Munich, and with Mossad plugging dudes in Dubai hotels nowadays, it was a good time to catch up. Without getting all spoiler alert, can we talk about Spielberg's choice to show super sweaty Eric Bana plowing his wife while obsessing about the Munich Olympics? Can we all agree that we already knew Eric Bana was obsessed, and watching him obsess-plow his wife was wholly unnecessary? Is obsess-plowing ever necessary? That is the question she asked.
The Hurt Locker
I probably would have liked it more had I not known it was going to win Best Picture.
The Invention of Lying
Three or four hilarious scenes -- basically, the scenes featuring cameos -- in the middle of an otherwise disappointing comedy. Ricky Gervais is held to a higher standard, and he did not meet it.
The Vicious Kind
Do you guys know Adam Scott? The mean guy from "Step Brothers" and the lead character in the awesome "Party Down" series?
He's in this movie, which was financed by Neil LaBute, which makes sense because it's got mean, disturbed characters like his "In the Company of Men". Adam Scott's performance is super good, and it's a really captivating movie, even if it's not an awesome movie. Does that make any sense?
In The Loop
This is an awesome movie. It's like the BBC "The Office" crossed with "Glengarry Glen Ross". It was nominated for best screenplay this year, but it lost, of course, because we had to give the Iraq film every award, even though this and "Inglorious Basterds" were both way more original. Very funny, very smart, highly recommended.
Get Carter
Michael Caine is a gangster that takes the train from London to Newcastle to find out who killed his brother. There's a lot of classic 1970's pointless camera shots, from the "shaving with an electric razor for a full minute" to the "woman in the tub splashes a little water over her breasts". Lots of nudity, Michael Caine wallops a dude with a stick -- good stuff all around.
$1 at your local Super Target. While disgusting supplies last. Do you think some poor kid is going to have his first kiss taste like purple horseshoes?
Speaking of disgusting, I went to Borders after taking this photo. My lady was showing me her book selections when I saw a man in the corner of my eye. She said she was ready to leave, and I responded, "We can't leave until I figure out what magazine that guy just kissed."
He was a late 20s - early 30s man in very casual clothes, sweats and sneakers, holding an issue of "M" magazine. I can't be sure which page he kissed, but I don't think I saw him flip the page away from the Miley Cyrus article/photo. Also, he smelled bad. Also, shut it down. Shut all of it down.
Have a good St. Patty's Day this week. Pour some out for our fallen leprechaun.
"If you find an old sun-bleached tree limb, you can put it up to your face and act like a walrus."
