i was actually going to e-mail you about a recent topic of discussion. over the past few months, a karaoke craze has swept through the plains of ohio, or at least among my friends. it's become just about an every other week event, and it's sprung many musical arguments among us. the most recent topic is very strange, but i thought i'd appeal to your encyclopedic knowledge of music anyways. here's the issue: we were debating what song would say (assuming two guys are singing together) "these guys appeared heterosexual but they can't be after choosing to sing that in public" the strongest. this discussion was brought on after a torrid performance of roxette's "joyride" last week by two of my friends after which they were heckled. thus far, here are some of the suggestions:I've sang some karaoke duets with other dudes before, from Simon and Garfunkel's "Cecilia" to REO's "Keep On Loving You". I've also shared a wall with a homosexual, making me eminently qualified to throw in my two cents.
1. any wham / george michael song but particularly "father figure"
2. melissa ethridge "come to my window"
3. village people "in the navy"
4. duran duran "the reflex"
5. chris isaak "wicked game"
6. reo speedwagon "can't fight this feeling"
7. journey "faithfully"
Gay: Peter Gabriel "In Your Eyes"
Not Gay: Hall and Oates (anything by Hall and Oates)
Gay: Foreigner "Cold as Ice"
Gay: REM "Nightswimming"
Gay but don't know it: Big and Rich "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy"
Surprisingly comfortable in their heterosexuality: George Michael and Elton John "Don't Let the Sun Go Down on Me" (the live version)...but only if the first singer does the classic, "Ladies and gentlemen, MISTER ELTON JOHN!!!" before the second verse starts.
(Can you tell I really, really want to give that karaoke performance?)
9 comments:
There's nothing gay about "Cold as Ice", and fuck you for even implying it.
I would think that Salt 'N Pepa's "Shoop" would make the list. And let's not forget Right Said Fred's "I'm Too Sexy". X-tina Aguilera's "Dirty" comes to mind, as does "La-la" by Ashlee Simpson. Although, now that I think about it, I would love to see those performances...
It was my Grandma's 80th birthday celebration in a small town about 30 miles southwest of Wichita, KS, and the family had rented out the church gym and lunchroom for her large family of 13 sons and daughters, and some 60+ grandchildren. Because she was a very good sport, some of my aunts and uncles decided to do a tasteful 'Roast' of my grandmother. Following the 'Roast', my uncle Virgil was then going to turn the mic over to the grandchildren to have some fun and do karaoke (the whole set up included a TV since he was a DJ in Neveda, MO.) I believe my sisters did a New Kids on the Block song, possibly Hangin' Tough (which, coincidently, would also be a very gay song for 2 guys to sing) and a great number of country songs were also ripped to shreds. I chose a hip-hop song, and wanted to tackle my nerves by doing it alone. I got up on stage and knew every word. After about 2 lines of Salt 'n' Pepa's 'Shoop', I knew that I had chosen poorly.
I don't remember much of the performance, but my father's face pretty much summed it up. He gave a flimsy-handed half-clap, and looked like he was just asked the hardest question he had ever been asked just after he drank a glass of lemon juice, not to mention the beet red coloring of a father's face whose son might or might not be gay and is 'coming out' at his grandmother's 80th birthday in a small town in the bible-belt of America.
I swore never to karaoke songs that were originally performed by women again.
So many thoughts...
1) Having shared the stage with the Maestro on many occasions (Keep on Loving You, It's Tricky, Hello Goodbye, etc.), I was never concerned that we were coming off as gay. Maybe we considered that. Maybe it was the fact that we were the only ones in the bar. I happen to think our "leave it all on the stage" rendition of You've Lost That Loving Feeling has got to be some of the best work I've ever been a part of.
2) I can't imagine The Reflex EVER working in a karaoke setting. Does anyone remember the SNL sketch where Farley was playing Simon LeBon & "singing" that? This sometimes shakes me out of my dreams.
3) I agree with the Hall & Oates take (it works), unless the song is Kiss On My List.
4) I would steer clear of anything by Air Supply.
5) ...and also any song that is meant to be a M/F duet: Summer Lovin', Almost Paradise, Up Where We Belong, Don't Go Breaking My Heart, etc.
6) I think the Maestro would disagree with the the whole avoiding female songs take (at least when solo) -- he has built a formidable reputation on this -- but I'll let him speak for himself.
7) I think karaoke itself is considered gay when you're in the sticks/Bible Belt. I once thought I would bring the house down at a VFW in the boonies with The Weight...but the locals all just looked up from their Hamm's, while their eyes said, "We're going to cut your testicles off."
[-jeff.]
There is nothing gay about "Cold as Ice", unless 2 dudes are singing it.
Karaoke isn't always gay in the Bible Belt - you just have to give the crowd what they want. In the case of Oklahoma City, it was The Georgia Satellites.
I thought of another tune today - two guys singing Carly Simon's "Nobody Does It Better" would be very gay.
I believe Hall and Oates will be playing at the MN Zoo this summer!
Heather
gay karaoke, top 10:
1. I've Never Been to Me - Charlene
2. Go West - Village People
3. Billy, Don't Be a Hero - Paper Lace
4. My Baby Loves Lovin' - White Plains
5. I Love the Nightlife (Disco 'Round) [Original Version] - Alicia Bridges
6. Can't Help Lovin' Dat Man - Trudy Richards
7. I Will Survive - Gloria Gaynor
8. Fine Romance - Lena Horne
9. Shake Your Groove Thing [Original Mix] - Peaches & Herb
10. I Don't Care If the Sun Don't Shine - Patti Page
11. Finally [7" Choice Mix] - Ce Ce Peniston
12. Take a Letter Maria - R.B. Greaves
13. Mamma Mia - ABBA
14. Save the Best for Last - Vanessa Williams
15. I Love the Nightlife (Disco 'Round) [Real Rapino 7" Mix] - Alicia Bridges
16. Go West [Original 12" Mix] - Village People
17. I Will Survive [1993 Phil Kelsey Classic 12" Mix] - Gloria Gaynor
18. Shake Your Groove Thing [Original 12" Mix] - Peaches & Herb
19. I Love the Nightlife (Disco 'Round) [Phillip Damien Extended Vox] - Alicia Bridges
Otherwise known as the soundtrack to The Adventures of Pricilla, Queen of the Desert. A beautiful film, a fabulous soundtrack. Pity that karaoke bars haven't quite caught up with gay as mainstream yet, because I check every single karaoke bar for track 10. That song was made for me to karaoke. And so the unwittingly gay boys are stuck with Air Supply.
But Peter Gabriel? Who said that? That's so wrong.
Again, there's nothing gay about a dude singing "In Your Eyes". There's something very, very gay about 2 guys singing "In Your Eyes".
ah yes, two men. that's right. I forgot that crucial detail.
As I was thinking of gay karaoke today (alas, solos, not duets), I realized that it is Pride weekend, and any guy, gay or straight, solo or "partnered" should stand up and sing some Husker Du, Sugar, or just good old solo Bob Mould, because he is the rockinist gay dude I can think of.
My roommate has piped in with a comment. Just pick up a third and you'll be fine. But "ANY song sung by two guys... gay."
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