Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Text Dump

Time to delete my old text messages:

8/8/05
10:03 AM
Matt
Finger bang any sluts this weekend

8/10/05
4:10 PM
Matt
I smell your fuckpit

8/12/05
2:32 PM
Matt
Wanna finger me for a little while

8/13/05
1:16 AM
Floyd
So horny...So hard...So lonely...I miss your touch

8/22/05
10:12 AM
Matt
Moo

8/23/05
10:08 AM
Matt
If you meet a guy that wants to beat you up don't keep calling him hero cause he hates that

8/25/05
12:15 AM
Matt
I was inspecting my penis today and noticed the throbbing vein running down the top is exactly the same shape as the amazon as seen from space

8/25/05
12:19 AM
Matt
Have you ever jerked off to a picture of hitler

8/26/05
10:02 AM
Matt
Okay did I ever tell you that I don't believe in dinosaurs

8/27/05
9:40 PM
Matt
Wanna make fuck

8/29/05
4:25 PM
Matt
Inspect any poo today ha ha you work with shit

8/29/05
8:43 PM
Matt
go to tourettesguy.com

9/1/05
7:51 AM
Matt
I'm in chicago taking a shit

9/1/05
9:36 AM
Matt
I just saw the hottest girl ever followed by the fattest girl ever

9/30/05
5:03 PM
Matt
I want to make fuck to you.

10/3/05
10:10 AM
Matt
Hey did you bang any hairy cunt this weekend?

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

What the hell is wrong with Matt? What a fuck!

Anonymous said...

Who the fuck called me a fuck? Its simple humor asshole. I will fuck you, you fucker. Dan, you seriously need to fucking monitor the fucks who are reading your fucking blog. Side note: I rather enjoyed the post, I found it refreshing. So, whoever called me a fuck can go fuck him or herself, if they can figure out how that would work.

Anonymous said...

It's me...Phil Green. Sorry I forgot to post my name on my previous post. Simple humor indeed. Dan, I'm sorry but you will now need to monitor my reading of your blog from now on. Now if you don't mind...

Peace, love and bananas,

Phil Green