*Euripides is the new Tupac. Please tell me someone gets this joke.
*Iron and Wine's Fever Dream is a shoo-in for inclusion on my next makeout mix CD. You can listen to a tiny part of it - probably still enough to get to 2nd base (the old school 2nd base, not the one these teens use nowadays) - at Amazon.
*The penis has sebacious/oil glands, just like anything else covered with skin, but because the penis is a unique fellow you can see the penis' glands. Little white bumps. Now, some of you may not find this interesting, but I do - what I find more interesting is that NO ONE EVER BOTHERED TO TELL ME THIS. You'd think with all of the STI education they'd throw in a "Oh, by the way, there are these little white bumps that are just oil glands. They're different from warts/etc. because they are smooth, not rough." Instead, I learn why girls can't go swimming. Thanks. That'll come in handy when I grow a vagina.
What else had no one told me about the penis? I did some internet research and found this little nugget. Huzzah!
One of my testicles hangs down further than the other. Is this normal? What causes it?WHY WAS I NOT TOLD??! HOW COULD THIS INFORMATION BE KEPT FROM ME??! HOW THIS BE KEPT FROM A MAN OF SCIENCE - A LOVELINE LISTENER FOR CHRISSAKE - FOR SO LONG??!
Yes it's normal. The right testicle hangs lower than the left. This is because the blood supply to the right testicle is different than the left. The testicle is suspended by a structure called the spermatic cord. This is like a rope or bungy cord. The spermatic cord contains the sperm duct, nerves, arteries and veins. The right spermatic vein attaches directly to the inferior venacava and at a level lower than the left spermatic vein attaches to the left renal vein. Hence the left side is held higher in the scrotum and the right side hangs lower.
My outrage is offset by my optimism for the new generation (the one with the retooled 2nd base) and their internet research abilities.
4 comments:
All I ask is that Eminem compose the music for the Euripides release.
I get the joke. It disappointed me.
What's the new 2nd base? Why was I not told of THIS? Seems this is pretty important information. Now I don't even know what base I'm getting to, and my statistics are gonna be all fouled up. Great. Just great.
And girls can't go swimming? Add "driving" to the list of things girls can't do, am I right? Am I right? Hey-O!!
After an unsuccessful Google, I've polled some friends to determine if my bold claim is true - is 2nd base still 2nd base, or is it something more advanced? Let's all hold our breath until the answers come back!
I heard first base was making out plus boob touching... second base was below the belt, third base oral sex, and a homerun sex. It used to be that both oral sex and sex were considered a home run...kids these days, so corrupt, so sexual.
-Corinne
Post a Comment